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friendly advice
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1. We’re here to help!
We can show you who’s in your area, but it’s up to you to actually get in touch with them. Avoid narrowing your search down at this stage and try to contact as many families as you can. Users have told us that sometimes even the less obvious advert can turn out to be the perfect share, but you’ll need to be proactive about it!
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Think carefully about what you post on your advert; you want to encourage people to get in touch, not put them off, so emphasise that you can be flexible to a degree as it’ll widen your audience.
We can always give you a hand if you’re unsure about what to say in your advert. Do feel free to contact us with any queries you may have about the site and we’ll be more than happy to help.
We understand that the bigger your local community of nannysharers, the more chance you have of making a great match. Word about our site has spread quickly, but if you want to give local mums more of a nudge then you could download some of our flyers and display them in local playgroups, coffee shops, libraries or gyms?
 The nannyshare Leaflet pdf 452kb
The nannyshare Advert pdf 33kb
2. Get the basics right:
Ask yourselves these simple questions before you consider a share:
- What’s your budget?
- Are the other family close enough?
- Are their views on parenting similar to yours?
- Are the daily logistics really doable?
You know the kind of thing – but do bear in mind that a little flexibility and compromise may be needed too.
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It’s great to start looking for a share with an open mind but there will be some areas where you just can’t compromise.
However ideal another family may seem, if they are on the other side of town you’ll have to consider carefully whether the share is practical. We’re not saying it can’t work, but the morning and evening travelling will be an issue you’ll have to address before agreeing to a share.
Watch out for overcrowding – if both sharers have large families, this could put a lot of pressure on your nanny and make a less than ideal match.
Don’t rush into anything before you’ve worked out what you want to spend on a share. Some families like to include babysitting and some light housework duties in the cost of the Nanny, so if you’re looking for the basic rather than the premium service, make that clear straight away!
Do ask about attitudes to parenting before you go ahead with a share. If you’re big on discipline and manners yourself, then what you want from your nanny will not marry with the ideals of a very permissive family. Small differences can always be worked through but fundamentally different perspectives won’t work and could end in tears!
A share is a partnership in which all are equal. Just because you are now using the other family’s existing Nanny doesn’t mean that you have any less say in things. The Nanny should look after and treat ALL children within his/her care both equally and fairly, regardless of who employed her first and regardless of whom he or she works the most hours for.
3.Money, money, money:
When you’ve worked out how the Nanny will be splitting their time, then you can start working out how to split the cost. A few things to consider when you’re doing that:
- If the Nanny is living in with one family this should be taken into consideration, as should any other perks (use of car etc.)
- Will you work out a set rate of pay for overtime?
- How will you divide the Nanny’s tax and NI contributions?
- Do you want to build babysitting time into the financial arrangement?
Bear in mind that if the Nanny is looking after both families’ children at the same time, she should be entitled to a higher rate of pay than a nanny working for one family only at a time.
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Be prepared: The best advice we can give you here is to be aware of the potential costs involved and agree well in advance how you’re going to divide them up between you. Do it in a way that doesn’t involve counting every single penny or everyone will be driven mad! On the other hand, don’t be so ridiculously generous that you end up resenting the other family for seemingly taking advantage of your generosity!
Nanny wages: As a general rule of thumb, a full time Nanny of average experience and qualifications working for just one family in the London area can expect to earn (net to them) around £350 - £400 per week so £70 - £80 net per day. If the same Nanny enters into a share, they can reasonably expect to be paid around £20 more per day, so £90 - £100 per day in total, depending of course on how much the workload has increased. Do bear on mid though that this IS a rule of thumb and there will be variations, depending on your location, the nanny’s experience and qualifications, as well as how much they’re expected to do.
Other costs: Although considerable, the Nanny’s wages, NI and Tax contributions are only one financial aspect of a share. What about the Nanny’s daily expenses? What about car insurance and petrol money? How are you going to divide any relevant insurance policies such as Household and/or indemnity Insurance? We don’t want to put you off, just merely make you aware of some of the costs that you may, or may not, have to divide as fairly as you can.
Think through the start up costs: Is new equipment like a double buggy needed? Are you going to need to buy 2 high chairs – one for your house and one for when your little one goes to theirs? There are some useful sites that can help keep the costs down such as nappyvalley.co.uk.
Hidden household costs: Be sensitive to the fact that these may arise if the share takes place solely or predominantly at one person’s house. But don’t nit-pick so much that the whole situation becomes unbearable; is it really feasible to claim £30 per week on additional electricity and gas usage for your 6 month old daughter, when the nanny was already cooking for the other baby anyway?
Sharing with a nanny and her own child: How do you split the costs if it is actually a Nanny with her own baby that you are sharing with? In this case, we advocate that the nanny should be treated just like the other half of a normal share, so if you are splitting the weekly childcare literally 50:50, then you should expect to pay half the costs of a full time share Nanny. It is worth remembering the considerable childcare costs that the Nanny is saving by bringing her own child along to work; it may be costing you £50 per day in a share to go to work, but it’s not costing her anything!
Going from a sole employer to sharing your nanny out: Be clear with your existing Nanny what increase in workload or hours transferring to a share may involve and what they’ll be paid in compensation. Make sure it’s a forum for the Nanny to air their views as well; it’s always much easier to get things out in the open upfront. Besides, the Nanny may have some useful ideas and suggestions that you have overlooked yourself.
4.Tax and National Insurance:
Nannytax have written the following most frequently asked questions on this subject
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Q. What is a nannyshare?
A. When two families employ the same nanny and want the overall total cost to be shared proportionately
Q. Do the families need to know each other?
A. It is not essential, but it helps if there is some communication between employers
Q. If both employers are friends, is it legal for only one family to register and pay tax and NI?
Yes, but it’s not advisable, since the registered family would have to cover the costs in the event of a disagreement or falling out. Registering under one employer also costs more since there is no saving to be made in NI contributions.
Q. Why is it more cost effective to register as two separate employers?
A. Registering as two separate employers can make an annual joint saving on NI up to £1,500.00
Q. What is the most common problem arising with a nannyshare?
A. Agreeing a net pay and lack of communication between the employers, nanny and the payroll service.
Q. What are the differences between the main and second employer?
A. The main employer receives the full benefit of the nanny’s tax free allowance. The second employer must pay tax at Basic Rate.
Q. Why should families always agree a gross salary?
A. By agreeing a gross pay with nanny your total cost is always protected and there is no need to share the total cost. You are also not required to have communication with the other employers
Q. What is the standard personal tax code and what does this mean to the employer?
A. The amount each person is allowed to earn per annum before tax is deducted. This year this is £100.00 per week
Q. Why is it not recommended to split nanny’s tax code?
A. A tax code split is performed by HMRC, and is a much more formal arrangement. It is ultimately the nanny’s decision if she wants her tax code to be split or remain whole. She will need to obtain the information required to split the tax code from her other employers. We cannot guarantee how long it will take to receive split tax code therefore it is nanny’s responsibility to chase HMRC for the new tax codes. Splitting the tax free allowance may create an underpayment if split incorrectly which may increase your costs as an employer.
Q. What does it mean to share the costs proportionately?
A. Nannytax calculates the joint total cost and if the agreement was made on a net basis, we work it back to a gross pay (which protects the employers costs going forward). The main employer with the tax free allowance will pay more of the nanny’s salary but less to the tax office. The second employer will pay less of nanny’s salary and more to the tax office. Nanny is accurately taxed and both families are paying the correct amount. It doesn’t matter if nanny works more hours or receives a higher pay with one of the families.
Q. How is holiday decided upon when two families are sharing a nanny?
A. It is calculated in the same way as a full time employee. We would recommend that one week of holiday is taken at each of the employers discretion and the remaining two weeks is taken at the nanny’s discretion.
Q. Are there any special considerations to take into account regarding sick pay and leave?
A. The nanny may be entitled to statutory sick pay from both employers but will need to satisfy the qualifying conditions and waiting days in both employments.
Q. What happens when a nanny who is in a share becomes pregnant?
A. As long as nanny is earning £87.00 gross per week in each employment she will qualify for statutory maternity pay from each employer.
5.Be open and honest:
It’s tempting to wash over the nuts and bolts of your childcare needs when you first meet a family you’re keen to share with but, trust us, clarity in the early stages is important for a successful share.
- If little Lucy has to be taken to ballet, swimming, karate and gymnastics every week, speak up straight away.
- If baby Ben follows a strict diet then mention it upfront, so that a working solution can be found.
You get the point!
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If your little one has allergies or perhaps a learning difficulty, then do mention this up front. People need to know where they stand so that they can come up with the best way of incorporating this into their daily lives.
After school clubs, play dates and toddler activities need a little more planning when you share a Nanny. You may want your children to benefit from every class going, but is it fair to expect your share family’s children to be dragged from pillar to post in the process? Chat to your share family about the activities you are keen for your children to pursue, they may love the idea of drama class and book their own brood in too – problem solved!
If you have a job with erratic finishing times, then say so upfront and build a bit of leeway into the schedule accordingly. This way you won’t be throwing arrangements into chaos if you have to attend a late meeting.
If something starts to bug you then pluck up the courage to say something and don’t let it build up into resentment. More often than not, others will be keen to accommodate your wishes as it’s in everyone’s interests for the share to work.
If it’s feasible, try and take a long-term view – what are you planning on doing about childcare when your children reach school age? Are you planning on having more children? If the lines of communication between you and your share family are good, then you can work out ways to make the share keep working despite changes in circumstances
6. Location, location, location.
Think about where the children will be looked after if they’re sharing the Nanny’s time.
- Will you choose one house to base the share in?
- If you’re using both homes, how will you divide the time?
Wherever the children will be, establish a regular routine so that everyone knows where they stand and make sure the base home has all the necessary toys and equipment to hand.
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There are no hard and fast rules here, so state your preference over where the share should be based early on and you’ll be able to work out a timetable that suits all. Some people are keen to have the share based 100% in their home, others are happy for their little one to be in the other family’s home all week and others want to mix it up a bit. That’s the beauty of a share; you can tailor it as much as you like to your own needs.
If you do want to use both homes, think carefully how you’ll divide the time. Pre-planning a one week here, one week there system could be less messy than deciding where your Nanny will be on an ad-hoc basis.
If your child is to based away from home, make sure a few favourite toys travel with him/her to help them feel comfortable in their new environment and it might be worth asking your share family if you can keep a couple of emergency changes of clothes there so you don’t need to pack a big kit bag every day.
Given the more complicated logistics inherent in a share, wherever you decide the share will be based, try to make sure you’re close to each other. It’s always easier to cope with the unforeseen if it’s on your doorstep.
7. Playtime!
Agree at the outset how you’re going to approach organising holidays and how you’re going to cover your Nanny’s leave period. Some forward planning can makes things run really smoothly.
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One of the largest stumbling blocks for sharers is how to carve up the holidays. Some get one family to dictate a third, the other family to dictate a third and the nanny dictates the final third. In other shares, all parties sit down together and try and come to a collective agreement.
Whatever way you decide to deal with it, just make sure you do so well in advance so that everyone has enough time to work around it and sort something else out, if needed. Whatever you do, don’t book anything until you have at least mentioned it to the others!
8. Sickness
Like it or not, even the toughest child or nanny feels under the weather sometimes.
- If your child is sick, consider your partner family. A runny nose and feeble cough is pretty run of the mill but, if your child has a raging tummy bug that’s clearly contagious, you might consider keeping them with you.
- If your Nanny is sick, maybe you could team up and help each other out?
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If your child is sick and needs to stay home from school/nursery, then try and give as much warning as possible so that arrangements can be changed if necessary. If you yourself are sick and the share takes place in your own home, have a word with the other family to see if the share can take place at theirs instead that day.
There’s not much you can do about the inevitable spread of a cold within a share – children are more than generous with their germs – but you may be able to stop the rot with other ailments. If your child gets chicken-pox, head-lice or some other contagious nasty then you should at the very least warn your share family and depending on the severity of the illness, consider keeping them home with you for a couple of days.
If your Nanny is sick both you and your share family are in a bit of a childcare mess. But if you know your share mum has an important meeting she really can’t miss and it’s not such a problem if you’re away from the office for a day, then you could offer to have both sets of children. One good turn leads to another and you never know when you’ll need a favour. This kind of consideration is what can make shares so great … being a parent can be tough sometimes and a supportive gesture goes a long, long way.
9. Be nice to your Nanny!
Be aware that your myriad demands as an employer are probably being matched by your partner family! Nannying within a share can be rewarding for a Nanny who’s looking for variety and challenges in their work but you must be sensitive to the extra pressure it may sometimes bring. Be prepared to listen to and act on concerns they may raise and maybe consider involving them when you’re thinking through the logistics of the share.
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Communication is key – and not just with your share family. Your Nanny will be the one spending a lot of time with both sets of children, so use her knowledge base if you’re unsure of anything. You may be surprised what you learn sometimes!
Just because you might be happy to take a four week holiday in mid January, doesn’t mean your Nanny is. They might understandably prefer to take time off if August with friends, so do take the nanny’s needs and wants into consideration when carving up the year.
If your Nanny has worked for you for some time and you want to keep her on, talk to them. Discuss openly what you’d like to do and how you’d like to go about it. If the nanny gets on board with the idea of a share (and an extra £50 - £100 a week normally swings it) then why not get them involved in choosing your share family? After all, they might spot something that you have over-looked.
10. Do your homework.
If you’re employing someone to look after your child, do be thorough about references, police checks etc. Don’t presume your partner family has it covered, if in doubt DO IT YOURSELF.
11. Make the most of it!
We’ve saved the best for last. Nannysharing can simply be good fun. Long-lasting friendships can be struck and we’re not just talking about the children. Enjoy the experience and take advantage of the support a partner family can offer.
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